Monthly Archives: July 2013

When My Dog Pushed My Buttons and What I Learned from It

The other day I went kayaking with my husband, some friends, and my puppy, Maggie. Last summer, Maggie’s first summer, she learned to nestle with me in the dell of my kayak. She wasn’t always happy to sit still but she got better as the summer progressed and seemed to enjoy being out on the water with us. This summer I was anxious to see what she retained from her kayak experience.

As I had done the previous summer, I attached Maggie’s leash to her harness and tied it around my waist. She would have none of it. I worked for a while encouraging her to sit as she had done last summer (when she was much smaller I might add). As she kept fighting what I wanted her to do, I got more forceful and controlling until I was screaming at her and trying to push her down into a sit.

She squirmed and barked and refused to sit. She tried to get up on the bow of the boat, and I pulled her back afraid of her falling

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Are You Really Listening?

I often talk about the importance of listening to our children—really paying attention to what they are saying and doing—so that we learn how to “read between the lines” of their behavior and are better able to interpret what they say and do. When we understand our children, we take their words and behavior much less personally, have more empathy, and thus can respond rather than react.

I am reading T. Berry Brazelton’s memoir, “Learning to Listen”. If you don’t know who Brazelton is—you should. You probably have heard of Dr. Spock the pediatrician from the 50’s and 60’s who did a lot to change the way we look at parenting. Brazelton is the Spock of the 70’s thru now. He’s 95 and still going! He has written a ton of books and has the best knowledge and advice for parents of anyone I know. He has spent a lifetime learning about who babies are and what each one is telling his parents.

When he was in medical school in the early 1900’s, he was disillusioned and disheartened by the

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